Thursday, August 1, 2013

This is me, around the age of 5 or maybe 6.  To you this might look the the face of a happy child.  And for the most part I think I was very happy.  Unfortunately, at this young and innocent age I was sexually abused.  I didn't realize that's what it was until sometime later.  In fact a long time later.  I do know that it had a very ill effect on my entire life. 
I find that even now after years of counseling and a profession of faith in Jesus.  I still struggle with the demons of my past.  I still carry anger, not that I wish to feel these emotions, they are in me and they are real and they haunt me day and night.  
I don't really know why I feel like I have to write about this.  I don't know if it's a continued journey of trying to heal from deep dark wounds.  I find myself spewing out accusations towards innocent bystanders. Or to those who maybe think they know me, and find they are shocked by something I say or do.  I confess, I am messed up!!!!  But not completely!  I have found comfort in praying, exercising, and re-connecting with life long friends.  My love for beading gives me hope, and such a feeling of accomplishment.  I always felt like a failure, like I couldn't ever accomplish anything.  Until I found my passion for bead weaving.  
My life is a long painful story, and I feel like I've wallowed in it long enough.  I confess I have a very hard time when I do things wrong.  Or I seem to repeat the same mistakes over and over.  I find hope in God's promises to me in His Holy word.  So as I continue on my spiritual journey of hope and healing.  Pray for me if you pray, or think good thoughts and send them my way.        

Saturday, July 27, 2013

Biker Babe

Commissioned piece

Vintage Button

Swarovski Crystals

Silver Lined Bugles

Brass cuff inside

By CJ Bauschka  

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Thursday, April 25, 2013

One Of A KInd by CJ Bauschka

I absolutely love to create one of a kind jewelry.  My mind is constantly going, seeing colors together, seeing wire,  beads, fibers, colors, textures, they all pop out screaming I want to be something amazing.  I pray and and just allow whatever comes out to form whatever shape or design reveals from playing around.  It all happens by surprise.  I love what I do!!!!  Be Blessed and use your imagination to it's fullest!